Following the news that Australian businesses are selling clean Australian air to the Chinese, a group of Scottish Entrepreneurs are trying to sell Scottish air to the Chinese.
China has one of the worst air pollution records with nearly 20 million people suffering from smog related illnesses every day. With much of the country powered by fossil fuels, the air quality has become so bad that the Chinese have been importing bottled clean air from Australia.
Chinese consumers bored with supping air from Bondi Beach or the Blue Mountains, now have the choice of breathing in the air of Scotland. Hamish McHamish, a 57-year old self-styled entrepreneur from Aberdeen has launched a range of unique Scottish air, canned and shipped to China for as little as $20 per can.
The smog-ridden Chinese can now make their journey to work breathing the air from a can named Edinburgh Brown – Edinburgh air with a hint of heroin abuse. They can also choose Glasgow Grey – cans of Glasgow air with a whiff of cheap alcohol and fried mars bars and Hamish’s personal favourite – Aberdeen Black – fresh Aberdeen air with a nose-tingling bouquet of oil refinery about it.
When asked if his range of canned Scottish air was doing well in China, Hamish McHamsish said from his caravan in Aberdeen “Aye, after selling sand to the Saudis, ice to the eskimos, my range of Scottish air is flying off the shelves” He added “they’ll buy any ol’ rubbish those Chinese”.